Christianity paved the way for shame-free single living

I randomly stumbled upon Tim Keller's blog today.  Check out this valid, thought-provoking, and hope-giving point:

"According to theologian Stanley Hauerwas of Duke University, Christianity was the very first religion or world-view that held up single adulthood as a viable way of life. Jesus himself and St. Paul were single. "One…clear difference between Christianity and Judaism [and all other traditional religions] is the former's entertainment of the idea of singleness as the paradigm way of life for its followers." (Stanley Hauerwas, A Community of Character p.174) Nearly all religions and cultures made an absolute value of the family and of the bearing of children. There was no honor without family honor, and there was no real lasting significance or "legacy" without leaving heirs. By contrast, the early church not only did not pressure women to marry but it institutionally supported poor widows so they were not forced to remarry as they were out in the culture at large.

Why? The Christian gospel and hope of the kingdom-future de-idolized marriage. "Singleness was legitimated, not because sex was questionable, but because the mission of the church is 'between the times' [the overlap of the ages]…We must remember that the 'sacrifice' made by singles was not [just in] 'giving up sex' but in giving up heirs. There could be no more radical act than that! This was a clear expression that one's future is not guaranteed by the family but by the [kingdom of God and the] church…" ( Hauerwas, p.190)...

... The gospel frees singles from the shame of being unmarried they find in conservative cultures. Their truest identity is in Christ and their assured future hope is the kingdom of God. Even bearing children, in the Christian view, is merely nurturing more lives for the family of God. That can be done in other ways than the biological. "

Singleness in the first century was so counter-cultural.  At that time, one's life was justified by his family.  If a man had a wife and kids, that was success.  If a woman was single, she was basically worthless.  If she was not married and using her child-bearing abilities to their full potential, then what was the point of her life?

I loved reading that "the early church not only did not pressure women to marry but it institutionally supported poor widows so they were not forced to remarry as they were out in the culture at large." 

Jesus totally redefined the value in human life.  He gave an example for the early church singles to live by.  Our value is not in our spouse, our family or our kids. If we never marry or never have kids, our value is not less than anyone else's.  We are children of God, and we have a purpose that goes beyond family.  Our purpose is to be in relationship with God above all.